being still so i can hear

this idea of being still has been reinforced in all sorts of ways...

this morning i got woken early and unable to go back to sleep but not wanting to disturb simon i lay there quietly and heard the world around me wake up... gentle rain, light emerging, one bird then hundreds greeting the day.

stillness gave me the gift of being with the miracle of a new day arriving. I didn't have to do anything about supporting it or shaping it, i just had to be still and the more still i was the more i could be present as it unfolded.

i am also reading "LIFE, PAINT AND PASSION. Reclaiming the magic of spontaneous expression. By Michele Cassou and Stewart Cubley.

it is a challenging book which alternately makes me want to lock myself in my painting space for a week or run and hide under the duvet

but the phrase which rang out to me last night was this

"Theories can be made one way or another about the content of your painting. .... There is an intelligence within you that is superior to any solution contrived by the mind. If yu dare follow the inner call without reservation, you are putting your trust in a reality that can never be captured by ideas or concepts. This is the challenge of creative exploration."

The mind loves theories - they are the noisy proclamations the mind can make that muddy the waters of creating.

I feel, in order to connect with the creative spirit that lives outside of me, that makes me feel like i am coming home when i am in it's presence and working through whatever it is that it delivers me, i must be quiet.

Quiet not only in the stillness of not making sounds but quiet in the head.

Not constantly asking if i have balance or what tonal values work or what my husband might say when he walks past...

none of that action and noise

what i desire is the stillness to be present to what is happening right inside me, right in front of me

then i won't be a painter with a reputation or a body of work or an income

then i will be painting

and that is what i want