learning my compass

i have been having a busy time lately

immersed in a course of action i committed to some time ago

some buoyant, self assured, courageous time ago - a time when being so full of creative fire meant i thought i could step back out into the world of people and their politics - small scale, manageable, able to be injected with some of that creative fire and grow...

as i mentioned in my last post i then made an enemy during my work and i have allowed that to unravel all of that adjectives above

i see, from some far off part of me that i am responsible for my feelings - i can choose whether i respond with fear and self loathing, or whether i examine the criticism and feelings i have aroused in another and find our where the truth lies for myself and remain loving towards all concerned.

I wish i was closer to Buddha-hood than i am because even writing the last part of the sentence made me feel more grounded

but here i am at waking again with bad thoughts at 4:15 am

feeling uptight
lacking confidence
dithery

i have been doing my best to check my compass,reorient myself to the love and often failing but i need lots of practise at that ....

i have been aware when learning the way my own true north is, that this is a clear signal not to lay myself onto the path of that particular locomotive again

the world of busy-ness and personal politics is not where my soul lives

it is in creating and listening to the whispers of the divine - i know that now...

i was reflecting on that and using it as a marker - a way to find myself out of this morose patch when i read this in the daily love

"I know it is hard to accept, but an upset in your life is beneficial, in that it tells you that you are off course in some way and you need to find your way back to your particular path of clarity once again."



- Susan Jeffers, best-selling author.


roll on sunday (most of the work will be over then)
roll on clarity