little jane

(little jane who turned up in my BIG painting over at DirtyFootprintsStudio

My beloved friend mollie (whom you will meet here in the comment section - wise and kind and good) has helped me find a path to inner child work.

I had always found that kind of thing a bit on the far out side of woo woo.

But the more i researched it and the more i allowed that possibility in, the more i heard little whispers from my heart and the more it became clear that inside this rumpty 45 year old body is a wee girl.

she has a pretty ugly hair cut.

and the big red birthmark on her face.

and skinny legs.

and grazes on her knees.

and stubbed toes.

and she has all the fears and ideas that trip me up as i reach into this journey with creativity and reclaim my soul.

So, I have taken to talking to her.(in my head - if i start chatting out loud i know they will have good grounds to come and take me away)

and it is soothing beyond measure.

Yesterday i had to spend an extended period with my mother...

i have tried all kinds of techniques of staying whole when i am with her with varying success (but i usually end up giving her the fingers behind her back so i guess they are not very successful!)

but since i have been chatting with little jane something remarkable has happened....

i can find her when i am getting sweaty and jittery and i can ask little jane if she needs a cuddle, and i can tell her that i am on her side and it is ok.

and i get full of power. Me, the 45 year old.

i feel safe, grounded, able to cope.

little jane helps this 45 year old jane feel alive.

Who knew?

(apart from mollie of course! but i should know by now how wise she is! <3 you mollie!)