Wednesday, April 6, 2011

jealousy and yearning


For many years i experienced yearning and jealousy

these were the times of my life where i was constantly unsure of myself

trying to please others to feel a sense of worth

i was often filled to the eyeballs with that toxic mix of yearning and jealousy - wanting to be where i saw others standing

longing for what they possessed

or what i imagined they possessed

that yearning and jealousy poisoned me, stultified me, paralysed me.

I inadvertantly found that by taking homeopathically tiny steps in the direction of the yearning i became stronger

with each step more able to step again
and again

and now i find that i seldom feel filled with those bitter juices

and i see that all yearning and jealousy are are signposts to my heart's desires that are dirtied and obscured by lack of self worth, self confidence, vision.

5 comments:

  1. so so soooo very true every single word!! :)

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  2. ohhhh nice...........wise.......helpful!
    thanks, woman!!!

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  3. I am learning that about jealousy .. that it is an indication that there is some quality (or qualities) there that I want to add or enhance in my life. It helps me not beat myself up so much for feeling it.

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